I’m 30.
I feel young, I feel old, I feel bloated.
If I look back at these years I’ve spent
Looking at screens, looking at stories
Seeing nothing, still paying rent.
I’m in love, I have furry babies
I like fantasy and manga,
Economics, diversity, philosophy.
All the things I want are just within reach
But I can’t learn, even as I try to teach.
30 years on this earth
30 years since my birth
Will I ever learn my worth?
I’m alone.
No one texting.
A hotel room in Boston.
Watching videos of people playing games.
My friends, since I lost the real ones.
I wish someone would call.
I wish someone would care.
Just in the way I like.
In the way I understand.
In the way I want.
30 is another year.
One more I guess, I hope, I fear.
The future is an unknown behemoth.
Will I reach my end at its momentous zenith?
I want to love a child of mine.
I want to understand you, in time.
I want to love, I want to feel.
30 is when I find my zeal.
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